Archive for June, 2009

22
Jun
09

TV3 awards the vice presidency to McCain

I’m watching the 5:30 news on TV3 right now, and they’ve just had a piece on the protests in Iran. The reporter commented that US Vice President Joe Biden stated he has doubts on the elections, which was followed by a soundbite from the Veep himself.

Only it wasn’t him. The on-screen caption clearly stated “US Vice President Joe Biden”, but it was John McCain telling us about his concerns over the disputed election results.

What are the chances of the same mistake being repeated on the 6:30 bulletin?

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18
Jun
09

Selling out is hard to do

I got my first request for advertising space on this blog yesterday. I’ve often been asked to promote some old nonsense somebody got into their heads (remember this), but this was the first time I was asked to link to a business website in return for material benefit.

via bighollywood.breitbart.com

via bighollywood.breitbart.com

I declined. The idea just seemed too odd to me. The company in question is a sports accessory website, and anyone who knows me knows I’m a proud geek. I hold sports in the same regard I hold casual racism. This aside, I have to admit I wasn’t too impressed with what I was being offered for selling out. Without going into details, I was directed to two product lists and told I could have one item for free on the understanding I would review it and provide a link in my blogroll. Now these items are hardly worthless. To somebody in the market this might have been a great offer, but to me they are of no use whatsoever.

It did, however, get me to wondering how fast I’d sell out if I were offered something I am interested in. Being a Bill Hicks fanboy, I’m always pissed off by celebrities endorsing products. When it comes to writers it’s almost unforgivable (who the fuck does Marian Keyes think she is doing ads for a photo shop). On the other hand, it’s just a blog. As much as I enjoy doing this, it’s hardly a sacred bastion of the legitimate arts. In reality, what’s the harm in it?

If anyone would like to further test my integrity I can be found at damien.foley1@gmail.com.

09
Jun
09

All Ears

I was in Galway for a couple of days last week, when I called into the hotel where I used to work. It’s something I do whenever I’m out west, as it’s a wonderful place (Glenlo Abbey Hotel) and I really enjoyed working there. It’s good to see the auld crew occasionally. Anyway, as I was sitting at the bar I overheard a conversation that I just had to share (kind of like that All Ears column by Michael Holden). Five old lads, all aged around 60, came in from the golf course and sat beside me. I presume the events described below took place in some dorm situation or some other occasion where a group of men would have access to each other’s clothes.

Man 5 (sitting closest to me): Tell the story about the socks.

Man 1 (furthest away): Socks?

Man 5: You know, the dye.

Man 1 (realising the reference): Oh, yer man in Athlone? Well, I started noticing my socks were disappearing. I’d think I had a pair, but when I’d go to get them they’d be gone. So, in the end I said enough is enough, and I got hold of this dye and put it into them.

Man 3: What do you mean “dye”?

Man 4: You know, that Strontium-Aluminate stuff, or whatever it’s called. For money and that.

Man 1: Yeah. Well, this fella came back from a dance one night, and he must have been sweating – with the dancing all, ‘cause the dye had sort of reacted with the sweat and had gone all the way up his legs. I didn’t want to say anything then ‘cause I knew it would be more than one day or two before it came off.

They giggled at the scenario and continued to discuss the merits and properties of Strontium-Aluminate in situations other than misappropriation of socks. Shortly afterwards, the man with the socks returned to the subject of the would-be thief.

Man 1: This same lad, he was a bit innocent, really. One time, he was taking this bird out for a walk [I’m guessing this is a euphemism], and he showed me a photo of the two of them together. I took a look at the photo and says to him: “Jasus, is that my jacket?”