26
Jan
09

Dentist

It looks like I’m going to have to give the auld dentist a wee visit, which is not a though that’s amusing me. I hate dentists. It’s been about eight years since I last had me teeth looked at, and the last time before that I was in primary school. I know we’re supposed to go every six month, but to me this sounds like snake oil dentists have collectively dreamt up to peddle money out of us.

Maybe I’m just blessed with unusually good teeth. They’re fairly straight and cavity free, despite my shunning of gob-doctors. I’ve amassed just one filling in my time, which I think is pretty good for a man in his late twenties. Of course even the most disciplined platoon can be let down by a Pvt Doberman, and even my heavenly gob is cursed with one molar that’s rotting away on itself. Interestingly, it’s the same one that got that filling eight years previous. It’s sort of collapsing around the filling, which isn’t pleasant. Just last night I was trying to pick away a bit of food that was stuck in there (as it tends to do) when I managed to pull out another piece of tooth. Not a good sign.

So it’s off to the toothologist with me. Oh, joy. The reason I’m apprehensive about this largely due to my last encounter with the fancy chair. In addition to doing an evidently shitty job, he also messed up the local anaesthetic while doing it. I don’t know if he missed the nerve or got the concoction wrong or what, but when he was cleaning out the cavity (and what kind of procedure called “cleaning” requires a drill) it hurt. I’m not being squeamish about it, it hurt in a way nothing in a free country should hurt. I didn’t say anything because I assumed it was supposed to be that bad, but when I went in a few days later to get the job finished it didn’t hurt nearly so much. Obviously he did something he didn’t do the first day. The cunt.

So this is what is making me nervous about going again. Maybe I’m being silly but I think that’s a right I’ve earned. Even if it turns out to be completely pain free, I’m still not sure how I’m supposed to pay for it. Never mind, it’ll figure itself out. In the meantime, I’ll leave you with this.


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